thank God its over.
we really need to catch up.
its been so long!
love you loads dearie. (:

aye start of MYE tomorrow.
i'm so going to die.
haha i've decided that i'm going to throw my MYEs away.
because i've got absolutely NO hope of getting decent grades.
soooooo
i'm just going to sit for the papers, and see how i do.
haha then i'll PIA for my prelims and Os after that.
i'm not joking! seriously.
just you wait, i'm so gonna prove myself.
that racheltan can and will become a nerd.
a cool nerd at that. :D

sports day brought back A LOT of memories.
memories of sec2.. when we were all a happy bunch.
and when i was still in garde. SIGH.
i miss those cheerleading days. haha i really do.
and seeing the cheerleaders do their routine just made me pine.
ahwell, just my luck to not be in garde anymore.
i think rose's cheerleading kicked ass this year. and i'm not being biased.
they were really good. haha and garde's...
well it was uh. uhm. okay? heh maybe that's an overstatement.
oops.
i felt you guys could have done better.
but due to some circumstances, it couldn't be helped i guess.
nevermind at least you guys did your best and that's all that matters. (:
other than that, garde owned this year man!
haha i'm so happy. house champion!
like finally.
yay. (:

okie dae.
shan't be coming here for a while.
not until the stupid MYEs are over.
hope i won't freeze in the hall though.
MISS ME! (:

these few days i seem to be invisible.
and i don't know why.
because everytime i pass by you or talk to you,
you look past me as if i'm not there.

my thoughts still stand on you being cold,
and now it seems like our friendship is superficial.
it seems like i bought a one-way ticket or something,
its always me giving, hardly ever receiving.
maybe i'm being selfish but i don't think so.

it has come to the extent that i don't feel 'worthy' enough to face you.
i don't like to tell you my troubles anymore, confiding in you like last time
because it always always seems like you don't care,
like i'm some insignificant thing that's in your way.

if i'm not wanted just tell me.
because i don't think i am.
you're always to preoccupied with your own friends,
never giving me any time, let alone any attention.
because once they come along, i'm not there anymore.

if you don't realise it,
its time you did.
i want our friendship to last, really.
not a superficial one, one that's only on the surface.
and i want you to know this:
i love you very very much
it hurts me more than you think it does to be treated this way.

```

bleh i don't want to retake my oral!
wonder who those crazy people were.
making us all suffer for their kiasu-ism.
sheesh.

thanks leng for listening to me ramble on and on just now!
maybe i was thinking too much. maybe not.
ahwell thanks again leng!
can't wait for tomorrow. (:

i'm hurt that i wasn't informed of the change in the CCA race.
oh whatever its obvious i'm not needed.

ahhh sports day sports day.
finally a sports day that i've got NOTHING to do at all.
kinda sad, actually.
because i can't contribute to anything.
nevermind i'll go cheer garde and rose.
haha though rose has no chance of catching up anymore LOL.
gosh i'm so unsupportive haha.

i'm not exactly very happy with a particular teacher now.
nope, not at all.
and i don't like it because i've always looked up to and respected that teacher.
but circumstances today have changed my perspective slightly.

5 items for napfa today.
sit and reach: 54cm. standing broad jump: 189cm. inclined pull-ups: 25. sit-ups: 35. shuttle run: 11.1s.
overall i'm disappointed in my results although i still managed to get all As.
i deproved in all the stations except sit and reach and inclined pull-ups.
ESPECIALLY shuttle run. i dropped from 1o.2s to 11.1s. how freaking retarded is that.
dropped the stupid bean bag in my first try, and blew my last try by hesistating at the line.
dammit why couldn't we have used the bloody white line instead.
and no thanks at all to the teacher who just wouldn't allow me to re-run.
even after my constant pleading, i got sharp remarks thrown back at me.
first it was "no time", then more than 5mins later, it was "you already got A, so i don't care that's your problem."
wow thanks a lot.

what's a physical test when you're not allowed to push yourself?
and all i wanted to do was to try to break my personal best.
besides, that 11.1s is going to dirty my score sheet.
wth i'm sick and tired of being brushed off like some insignificant piece of dust.

a big thankyou to my darlings eunice, nette, steph, kitty, twiny and leng for trying to cheer me up after PE.
especially eunice who had to bear with me during bio.
we successfully completed the mosquito poem. yay!

i think chinese listening compre was rather easy.
and i freaked out thinking that they would only read the passage once.
so i was quite relieved when they repeated the passages at the end.
hoho.

as usual, english oral was fun.
got ms wan again like last year so at least i knew what to expect.
thankfully i didn't fumble during the reading and the picture description was fast.
and the conversation topic was easy peasy lemon squeezy.
but i ruined it by saying fauna instead of flora.
ah dammit i hope ms wan doesn't know the meaning. HAHA!
ohyeah there was this stupid mynah that was trapped in the hall
and while everyone was quietly reading it flew around making so much noise.
it was rather amusing.

any self-respecting serious art/photo shop would sell mounting frames and photo frames for 8r pictures.
and i haven't found any so far.
they'd better start soon or i seriously am going to go berserk.

i never though i'd say this but..
I MISS TRAINING!
boohoohoos.
i can so feel myself gaining weight with every week that goes by.
and i still have yet to step into the gym.
bloody school week's so hectic i hardly have time for myself!
blah.

damn, we were massacred during pe today.
started off with one minute of harmless sit ups,
then it progressed to 3 sets of shuttle run,
3 sets of 6 of standing broad jump (both legs, then each leg),
1 minute of jumping,
and topped it all off with 3 rounds of sprinting which we did in less than 4mins.
oh my GOSH my legs were so wobbly after that.
and they were aching less than half an hour after pe ended.
i am so dead tomorrow.

garde cheerleading better buck up man.
i shan't say much because i don't think i'm in the postition to blurt everything out here.
but yeah.
keep working hard and don't give up!
although you guys may face a lot of obstacles, but persevere.
i know you can do it.

hoo boy.
i've been bored these past few days..
don't know whether that's good or bad though.
probably bad since it shows that i'm not having in interest in school.
ahwell.

hope i didn't screw up for my last chemistry spa yesterday.
thankfully i had stuff to write, considering the little amount of preparation that i did.
wonder when the biology one is.
now for THAT i'll be scared.

aye i shall repeat myself and say that i'm bored.
even now as i'm typing this.
i'm just doing this to waste the time while hana kimi loads on youtube.

speaking of which i'm glad to say that i've discovered the joys of watching hana kimi!
all thanks to monday when i didn't go to school..
and xiu yi is just so darn cute. haha or wang dong chen or whatever he's called.
i really should thank chris for introducing me to his existence.
if not for her i wouldn't have had a second thought about hana kimi either.
i just wish that he was the male lead instead of wu zun.
oh GAWD i can't stand his face its not appealing AT ALL.
and for goodness' sake he's NOT handsome! yuckers.
xiu yi's waaayy hotter.
tralalala!

ah damn.
just when i thought prom night was going to be a fun relaxing time where i can mingle around with friends and natter away about everyone's dresses.
but ALAS.
turns out that i'm going to be part of the entertainment.
i hope its rehearsed, i really do.
because the last thing i want to do is to go up on stage and malu-ate myself.
ON PROM NIGHT TOO.
boohoohoo.
actually, on second thought, this'll make me more determined to keep fit.
haha weights here i come!
hoots.

ahhh panda wanda it was nice seeing you again after so long!!
man oh man you really look very different in your ajc uniform.
i prefer you in cedar uniform, frankly.
haha but ohwell you got to move on i guess.
anyway, yeah we must go out soon!
and please please PLEASE be more feminine!
let your grass grow longer!
then you can bag a hot guy. xP