I just want a normal healthy relationship. Is that too much to ask?

```

My happiness is fleeting.

Finally met up yesterday. (:

Spent the time cleaning his room, and getting used to each other's presence again. One and a half months later I still feel the same. (: If only I had more freedom..

iloveyou.

First day in Bangkok's coming to a close. Spent the whole day walking and shopping, and I'm happy because I got quite a few accessories for myself, and three shirts. Pretty much too dead to do anything else now. Waiting for Fang to be done with the shower, and Brian and Puay to come over so we can play Monopoly Deal together. Then gonna crash and sleep my troubles away.

```

What's this missing from my life?

Oh wait, its just you.

Its raining outside now. I want to run out and cry. And let the waters from heaven wash away my tears and troubles.

Oh Lord, give me strength.

```

Heading off to Bangkok in a couple of hours' time with Brian, Puay and Jingfang. I hope the trip's a good one. I need something to distract me.

xoxo

I wish it wasn't so hard. I wish it could be normal and happy, how it should really be. But we can't last a week or two without you getting angry at me. I'm getting tired. Its draining, and runs me down. And I'm starting to hate it.

Why? Why can't you just be more understanding?

All I want is to love and be loved in return. After all, isn't that the best thing that could happen?