haven't really had the inspiration to blog, but i guess i'll just force myself now.
since i don't have anything to do anyway.

school's starting soon.
for JCs, that is.
the secondary school kids have started their new school year already, and it feels odd to be viewing them from another perspective.
an older perspective.
i still can't get used to that feeling...
that feeling of no longer being a secondary school-er, or rather a Cedarian.
it makes me feel so much older! sigh.
speaking of which, sab and i went back to Cedar last saturday to get some CDs from mrgoh.
and it didn't feel as if i was ever part of that school.
which kind of saddened me, because i'd say that i had my best years of education there.
i think its mostly because its a different building.
i really hate it when my old schools are torn down and rebuilt.
totally sucks because whenever i go back, its not the same.
different building, different atmosphere. :(
oh, and i saw my juniors too! although now its only one level of juniors that i can recognise now.
funny thing was, i still saw them as the lil' sec ones!
they're sec 4 this year. haha.
and then it struck me how old i am now (again) and how fast time really flies.
seemed like just yesterday when i saw them for the first time at training.
next year onwards, if i go back to visit, i won't be able to recognise any student faces anymore.
how sad. :(
i'm becoming just another "old girl of the school".

well, as you can tell from the above paragraph, i'm very very bothered about the fact that i am turning eighteen this year.
yeap, you heard that right.
RACHELTAN IS EIGHTEEN THIS YEAR!
as a matter of fact, racheltan is turning eighteen in 1 month and 24 days' time.
let's face it, i'm an old hag. ):
it'll be only 2 years left of teenage-hood, how sad is that!
although the plus side of turning eighteen is that its legal for me to drink alcohol in public, smoke cigarettes (over my dead body) and learn to drive.
anyway all that aside, i hope it'll be a memorable birthday this year.
not because its the big eighteen where everybody parties with all the big hoo-hah,
but because it'll be before i leave for australia.
i don't know, i just want memories that'll help me through my loneliness there.
OMG I SOUND SO PATHETIC, STOP IT!
haha but yeah. whatever.

met up with an old friend for tea a few days back...
to catch up and find out about studying in melbourne, because she studied there for two years.
found out a lot of things, both about the place and about her as a person.
i really admire how strong her relationship with God is. i really do.
i wish i could be like that.
hearing her go on and on so passionately about God just made me feel so shameful...
because i have known God all my life and she only a few years, yet my walk with Him is no where near hers.
but anyway its very heartening to see her like that, and especially since she has found someone special who's exactly like that too.
and she told me how she and he would bring their Bibles everywhere they go, and whenever they feel like it they whip it out and do quiet time.
she's studying in London now, and she only met that guy 10 days before she left.
and still their relationship is so strong.
then i realised that its because of God.
they both glorify God in their relationship, and walk so so closely with Him, and that's exactly why their long distance relationship is working so well!
ahhh i really got to hand it to them.
well then it also got me thinking if i'd be able to handle something like that.
i really want to believe that i can, but i know that i'd be mostly relying on myself i think, and not on God.
plus, i'm not walking close to God in my everyday life anyway. which annoys me but i just can't seem to change!
maybe waiting out 5 years would be better.
but part of me wants to take up that challenge.
haha ohwell, its already been decided anyway. and i'm fine with it. (:

i never realised how much i love sitting in the playground at night talking about anything, everything.
especially if its with someone special.
its addictive, i think.
haha. (:

watched Ip Man today!
OMG ITS SO TOTALLY AWESOME.
Ip Man is so cool hahah.
makes me wanna learn wing chun.
but then again i wanted to learn muay thai after watching ong bak so...
whatever haha!
andand! ongback2 is now showing!
ahhhh mel quickly organise that outing!
i can't wait! :DD