Just got back from the first party of Glenn's second round of O-week (short for Orientation Week). There's one party every night for this week. The angmohs really know how to enjoy themselves man. It was Back 2 School today, so everyone went in their school uniforms. I wore my old Cedar uniform. Felt really great wearing it again, and I really missed those good old days of blue and grey. Before we went to the party though, we were busy cam-whoring in my room. Ana, Sharon, Gen, Jerilyn, Vanessa. Had much fun. I didn't enjoy myself at all at the party though.. Music was really loud, lights were flashing, people dancing drunk everywhere. To cut the long story short, it wasn't my scene at all and so I felt really uncomfortable. But I put on a facade and pretended that I was enjoying myself. At least I was with my friends though, that was one consolation I had. And I got to see the crazy angmohs drunk and insane.. Making out, dancing like freaks and stuff like that. Ahwell.

I'm quite glad I went for the party, though. Even though I didn't have fun. Because from the experience I found out things about myself and confirmed things that I already knew. The clubbing and partying scene (as I already suspected) really isn't my scene. I don't belong there. Its just not me. I felt really horrible wearing the facade just now, it sucked. I don't understand why people would enjoy drinking, getting intoxicated and losing their sanity. Watching the angmohs making out with each other and being so loose, I felt so put off. It was so degrading, really. The dancing part I can understand a little. Its quite fun I guess, dancing to the music. But how they do it for hours on end is beyond me - I got bored after 15 minutes. . . Maybe its because I can't dance even if my life depended on it but still! Its all a waste of time, if you ask me. I know there are tonnes of people who would beg to differ but thats how I feel. I'd much rather be somewhere decent with my friends talking and enjoying each other's company. The dancing, drunkenness and all? Nah. Not for me.

So now I have this headache and my head spins whenever I stand up. I didn't even have a drop of alcohol though. Its probably the noise and stress that I had at the party. Another reason why I'm not ever going to party again. Sucks.

I'm thankful that I'm sure of what makes me me and nothing else. I'm thankful that I'm sure of who I am, and that I'm not someone who's so insecure that she'll be changed by the world. I'm still a little insecure, but that's at the surface. Deep down inside I'm confident of my identity and really, I think that's something that I am truly truly thankful to God for.

Anyway! Met up with Spas yesterday, finally! Walked around the city for the whole afternoon trying to look for boots to buy. In the end we bought some clothes from Jeanswest and accessories from Diva. Really good deals we got! My two tops from Jeanswest were at 2 for $40, and the accessories from Diva were going at 3 for $10. Spent a lot of money during the weekend though, so I'm feeling really awful and guilty now. S: Church today with Pris! Had lunch at a Chinese restaurant and had some kungpao chicken dish which was really nice! Then we walked around too before heading back.

I'm really glad that my dorm mates are mostly back from their holidays! Gen and Jerilyn are back from Singapore and LingChi is back from wherever she went! Haha. Dinner felt normal again - with everyone sitting together, talking and laughing our heads off. I missed those dinners so much when everyone was gone! No more take aways! Yay (:

Okay shit school's at 9am tomorrow and its currently 2am now. I'm so screwed up but whatever.